Stereotyping...We all do it at some point, about something. We make assumptions about things, and presume to much about others.
However, as far as children are concerned, some stereotyping can be damaging.
Take for instance kids which are not directed in their play by what sex they are, ie; girls which climb trees and play with guns, and boys who play babies and play-pretend house.
Is there anything wrong with these examples? As far as I am concerned, no, there isn't.
But for some, it continues to pose a problem. Boys should be boys, they should be out in the fields with a shotgun on their shoulders learning how to skin a rabbit and fashion a slingshot from twigs and deer hair.
Girls on the other hand should be tucked up safely at home, learning how to bake, knit, do cross stitch and braid each others hair.
I think this is a complete nonsense. I believe in order to develop as a complete person, one should be allowed to experiment in all areas of experience. Girls should be encouraged to discover what interests them, and likewise for boys, without the associated stigmas and stereotypes attached to them.
Take my son number 2 for instance, at the age of 5 he was completely besotted with all things Andrew Lloyd Webber. He had his complete works on CD, and would spend many hours not only listening to them, but singing at the top of his voice along to such tunes as Phantom of the Opera, Cats and Les Mis. By the time he was 10, he could inform anyone in detail about each musical, and could sing virtually every song from all of them.
However, he couldn't kick a football to save his life. And still can't.
Son number 3 loves nothing more than running about with a dolly in one hand and a pushchair wobbling about in the other, then sitting for ages feeding them imaginary tea and cake, before deciding to walk around the house with a pair of my shoes on.
Now, I haven't actively encouraged this behaviour in my children, I have simply allowed them to find their own interests and needs. When we visit car boot sales, if they pick something out which they would like, then I see no reason to say ' but that is a girls toy'.
Would I feel the same way if I had a daughter who wanted to take up football on a Saturday morning? I again see no reason why not.
My boys are still very much boys. They have all at some time, picked up a toy gun and have gone screaming from one end of the garden to the other lost in a haze of imaginary warfare. But they have also built dens and furnished them with cushions and frilly window dressings. I see no harm in either.
What is the fascination with tyring to mould our children into being something other than what they naturally are?
They are little learning machines, with a need to experience all their little minds demand.
They see no divide between the sexes when it comes to naturally educating themselves about their surroundings and them self. That divide is something which is put upon them. Sometimes for good reason, and others times for nothing more than to perpetuate stereotyping, and it is the latter that is often done without intention.
Is there ever a good stereotype?
Should we actively teach our children to judge through stereotyping?
Is the impact of stereotyping lessened or increased with Home Educating?
I have many more thoughts on this, and will make further posts pertaining to it in the coming days.
Loz
im afraid sterotyping is here to stay after a certain age a boy who plays with dolls would come in for a lot of stick around here! of course this is wrong but it happens here in the real world! i have seen it with my own eyes and did like it!
ReplyDeletei dont think your ever change this sort of thinking but agree with yuor post saying this-Girls should be encouraged to discover what interests them, and likewise for boys, without the associated stigmas and stereotypes attached to them. but im afraid in the real world it does not work like this!
should say did not like it! the grammer went wrong again LOL
ReplyDeleteI agree with the above poster on this occasion, wherever you go sterotyping occurs. My oldest boy pushed his pushchair and doll to school every day until some parent and child walking by commented on it being a girls toy. He was devastated and never played with dolls/dressing up/ cooking toys again :(
ReplyDeleteIt wasnt really the commenting persons fault, he was a little kid simply asking why that boy was playing with girls toys, however once said it couldn't be explained away by be or them in any way that would make sense to my 5yr old.
I think lately though, the tide has turned the other way. It's much more frowned upon for boys to be boisterous and loud these days. I am hoping it isn't the case everywhwere but in circles I have been in, boys who play guns, like football and want to playfight or rough and tumble are not popular with more autonomous/new age mums. Maybe this is a generalisation- hopefully other commenters can tell me otherwise, but I see the emasculation of boys as quite a serious issue and worry about wimpy boys who are unable to lead and take control in situations because they have been taught to take gentler approaches.
I hope you know I am not saying boys shouldnt play 'girls' toys or be gentle - all of mine have and are, but I also worry that boys arent given 'boys' toys so much these days either. I hope this makes sense :/
C
Hi Loz, thanks for this thought provoking post! As my father was not only a hard working farmer but also the best at cooking, sewing and knitting in our house growing up, I don't really like stereotypes at all. One would presume that home educated children are free-er of stereoptypes than schooled children as there would be much less peer pressure and more time to experiment and try lots of different things. But in saying that am I stereotyping schooled children?!
ReplyDeleteI am totally against trying to force children into something they are not - it only causes pain. Sometimes it is difficult to embrace who you are, but it's the only way to be happy. I'm getting a bit deep now!
Anyway - home educators in general are probably stereotyped by 'outsiders!', but it only takes a couple of minutes with a group of us to see we are all totally different, while sharing common goals.